Took a trip to the west coast this week.  Yelp, another trip out west.  This time I wanted to change it up a bit so I stayed in Oakland rather than San Francisco.  Very different indeed.

It was a long day at work so I decided I needed to go look at some sailboats.  So I did.  It was a beautiful view and very relaxing.

On my way in to the harbor I passed a Hibachi restaurant.  So I did what I normally do, I Yelped it.  Yelp had bad ratings.  It looked nice from the outside so I decided to take a chance.  Sometimes the Yelpsters are wrong.  I dove in.

As I walked in I wasn’t very impressed but sometimes the best food is at the worst looking places.  I asked for a spot for 1 and they sat me down.  The attendant sat me down with an African-American family there celebrating a birthday.  I fit right in!  I apologized for not bringing a gift and they invited me into their conversation.  Super cool family.

If you have eaten hibachi with me you know I ask for mine to be cooked completely weird.  I like meat and rice so I never get vegetables, NOT EVEN IN THE RICE.  I made myself very clear multiple times.  To add to the story let’s say around 4 times I made it clear.

The chef came out and started his show.  I kindly reminded them again “please,  no vegetables”.  He understood and started cooking.  He did have one cool thing where he threw an egg shell up into his hat.  I liked that and clapped for him.  He continued on and then I noticed it.  I could see a carrot in my rice.  It was the worse site ever.

As I continued to look it was all in the rice and egg.  I was overwhelmed with grief and despair.  He flipped it and flopped it right onto my plate.  I said “sir, please I asked for no vegetables”.  He said “they no veggies in dat rice!”  I said that yes their are and he told me he would cook me some more in the back.  I wasn’t amused.

All of a sudden it happened!  The power went off.  Right in the middle of his cooking.  I got out my phone and cut a light on for him.  Everyone did and WAALAAH a candle light dinner… Kinda.

He continued on and they brought me some rice out from the back.  It was horrible.  About that time the birthday girl started to choke on a piece of pineapple.  She sat up straight and started to snort and gag trying to free the pineapple.  She was breathing so maneuvers were not necessary but it definitely was interesting.

I finally had enough of the fun and needed to leave.  I walked around the corner where my server was and told her I needed my check.  The clock was ticking and I had been there nearly  1.5 hours at that point.  She said to me “YOU GO SIT DOWN.  WE NOT READY!”.  Um ok.

A few minutes later I walked back up and she told me my total.  I kindly told her that I did not have any cash and I needed to pay with a card.  She said “YOU PAY WITH CASH!  YOU NOT LEAVE UNTIL YOU PAY.  I WRITE YOUR CARD DOWN AND RUN WHEN THE POWER COMES BACK UP!”

I was totally taken back.  I didn’t feel comfortable leaving my card so…..

I took off running.  She ran after me.  I slammed open the door and jumped over the rail.  She was right on my heels.  I did an old Deion Sanders move but when I juked left and then right she did the same.  It was like she knew my every move.  She was closing fast.  Right before I got to my car she made one last leap… and grabbed my leg.  I was pulling and she was holding tight.  She stood up and started pulling my leg…

Just like I am pulling yours…. Or am I?

One thought on “Hibachi”

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